


Without You, Everything Is Missing

by kariohki



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Light Angst, Separation Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-10
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2020-11-28 18:56:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20971418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kariohki/pseuds/kariohki
Summary: Kokoro goes on vacation for a week and Misaki's life falls into disarray.





	Without You, Everything Is Missing

"You're going _where_?"

"Italy, I think? Or it might be France or Spain, I don't think my parents have really decided yet, but it's sooomewhere around there." Kokoro kicked her legs a few times. "They said no friends this time, or I'd take you along with me! Those places are supposed to be romantic!"

Misaki sighed. "I'd have to say no anyway, it's the middle of the school year." She felt like she had more words sitting on her tongue, but simply sighed again.

"Misaki? That's a lot of sighs." Kokoro slid off of her bed and onto the floor, giving the other girl a small headbutt. "I'll only be gone for a week! I know you can keep everyone in the band happy while I'm gone!"

Misaki gently ruffled the blonde girl's hair. "Yeah, yeah...I'll manage." She still had a weird feeling in the pit of her stomach, one that didn't go away even after she left Kokoro's house and headed back to her own to sleep.

-  
The Sunday that Kokoro left (on her family's private jet, of course) wasn't too bad. Everyone else in the band, including Misaki, was busy already, so there was no band practice scheduled. Between tennis practice and helping her mom with grocery shopping, the day was normal.

-  
Misaki woke up an hour earlier than her alarm on Monday. When she grabbed her phone to check the time, she noticed that Kokoro had sent her a few messages.

_"misaki~! just landed! it's dinner time in milan!"_

_"i have my own hotel room and it's waaaay at the top of the building!"_ A picture of the night skyline of the city followed this message.

_"i'm gonna sleep early tonight! you'll prolly be up in a couple hours after this...so here's a good morning kiss!"_ This picture was of Kokoro in her nightgown doing an exaggerated kissing face. Misaki felt herself blushing. She fired off a basic reply, hoping that Kokoro had remembered to mute her phone before going to sleep. Realizing it was useless to try to go back to sleep, Misaki decided to start her day early with a run around the block before showering and heading to school.

And school was just fine, if a little quieter than usual.

-  
Morning classes on Tuesday went by slowly, it felt. Misaki had briefly texted with Kokoro the previous night, mostly short replies and reactions to the multitude of photos the other girl was taking. She was happy that Kokoro seemed to be having fun on her vacation, but for some reason had this nagging feeling in her head. Misaki knew Kokoro was safe and well, but every so often a thought would come into her head. _What if she doesn't come back? What if something happens?_

Misaki found herself wandering to the third year classrooms at lunchtime. She noticed Kanon and Chisato walking out of their classroom and nodded in their direction.

"Oh, hello Misaki-chan!" Kanon cheerfully waved back. "How were your classes this morning? You look a little tired..."

"I'm surprised, with Kokoro-chan gone I'd think she'd be more relaxed." Chisato smiled slightly.

Misaki felt that weird nagging feeling drop into her stomach. "I-I'm fine. Just feels different." She ran her hand through her hair, wishing she had her baseball cap on to fiddle with. "Guess you two are having lunch together?"

Kanon wrung her hands. "Y-yeah! It's been a while since I got to eat with Chisato-chan because Kokoro-chan always grabs me...so I f-figured this week I'd catch up with her since she's been really busy outside of school--o-oh! I'm sorry if it sounds like I don't want to eat with you, Misaki-chan! You can join us...I mean, if it's okay with Chisato-chan too..."

Misaki raised her hand. "It's cool, I don't wanna make things awkward. Enjoy catching up with each other." Waving her hand, she walked off before Kanon could protest.

Once she got outside of the school building and around a corner, Misaki turned her phone on, checking for any messages from Kokoro. Nothing new. Misaki's stomach flipped again before she smacked herself in the forehead. "It's nighttime there, of course she wouldn't text, she's sleeping...she's fine..." she mumbled to herself.

She spent the rest of the break period wandering the school grounds, never actually getting any food. The rest of the day passed just as slowly as the morning.

-  
Wednesday started horribly. Misaki woke up multiple times in the night to check her phone to see if Kokoro had messaged her. A couple messages came through, but most of the time there was nothing new. And Misaki had trouble falling back asleep after each time she'd gotten up.

So of course the one time she fell into a reasonably comfortable sleep, it was nearly sunrise and she slept through her alarm.

Skipping breakfast, she still barely got to her desk before class started. Kasumi had shot her a concerned look that Misaki was able to calm with a slight smile and shrug. School crawled by even slower than the previous day. Misaki found herself alone at lunch again too, not wanting to bother Kanon again and seeing Hagumi hanging out with friends from her softball team.

To make the day even longer, there was band practice at CiRCLE.

"Aww, so Michelle isn't gonna be here today either?" Hagumi pouted.

"Uh well...when I told her Kokoro was going to be on vacation this week, she said 'I will also be gone, to the mountains to refresh myself!'...Something like that. She, uh, looked a little tired too so I think she needed the break."

In reality, Misaki was too exhausted to wear the Michelle suit today.

"How wonderful!" Kaoru brushed her hair back. "A journey into the mountains...it sounds that our friend must be on a spiritual journey. I do hope nothing has been bothering her recently. It is quite hard to tell with her face sometimes."

"You have no idea..." Misaki mumbled under her breath. She pulled out her phone. No messages since this morning, and that was just a leftover from when Kokoro said she was going to sleep. She looked back at the rest of her bandmates. They all seemed fine without their leader around, joking around discussing if Michelle really never blinked and other nonsensical things. 

So why was she feeling so _awful_?

"Mii-kun? Hey, Mii-kun!?" Hagumi's voice broke Misaki out of her thoughts. The orange haired girl moved to stand next to her. "Are you okay? It was like you were really far away for a bit..."

"I..." Misaki paused briefly. She didn't have a real explanation as to why her week was going so badly. Blaming it on Kokoro being gone felt wrong. "I'm fine. Just tired from not sleeping well last night."

Hagumi grabbed onto Misaki's arm. "But you looked more sad than tired...oh, you should come to Hagumi's softball game on Saturday! That's something happy to look forward to!"

Misaki made herself nod and forced a little smile, which seemed to please Hagumi. Inside, however, she still had that _awful_ feeling, and it persisted through the rest of practice and into the night.

-  
Thursday. It was Thursday, right? Misaki had lost track of the days. She was nearly late to school again today. For some reason she didn't want to get out of bed, and then she somehow made a wrong turn on her way to school. What did she even learn in her morning classes today? Her notes had words on them, but she didn't understand any of the concepts.

On top of all of that, Kokoro hadn't messaged her yet today.

With a grumble, Misaki opened her lunch. She knew she needed to eat, her head was already throbbing for some reason and she'd skipped breakfast once again. But her lunch just looked...boring. Bland.

"Holy shit, you're a mess."

Misaki jumped and looked up. Arisa shrugged and sat down next to her, putting a Yamabuki Bakery bag in front of Misaki's lap. "Saya told me to give this to you since you look so dead inside." Opening her own lunch, she continued. "Tsurumaki-san not being here is really messing with you, huh?"

"...I don't get it. I've spent fifteen out of sixteen years of my life not knowing her, and now she leaves for a week and it feels like my world is ending."

"Congrats, you have separation anxiety."

"I..._what_?"

Arisa finished chewing the half of a hard-boiled egg she'd shoved in her mouth and swallowed. "Separation anxiety. Not a major case of it, but you're definitely stressed because she's not here. And you're overly worrying about her." Arisa raised her hand as Misaki's mouth opened. "Don't say you aren't, because I saw you sneaking glances at your phone during class all week."

Misaki blinked a few times. "How do you know all of this?" The other girl quickly shoved the other half of the egg in her mouth. "...Oh, I get it. You have experien--ow!" Misaki rubbed her arm where Arisa had smacked her and sighed again. "It's stupid. My brain knows she's safe and having a good time. She's got her parents and the suit people with her, and she's not in some unsafe country or something. But I keep thinking she won't come back, or she will and she'll not want me around anymore, or..."

"Oh, stop that! Er...I mean..." Arisa coughed, still feeling the effects of eating an egg too quickly. "Well I still mean to stop thinking that way, but I kn--I've heard it's not easy. You're one of the most rational people I know, so I'm sure you can get through this. And Tsurumaki-san needs you as much as you need her."

Misaki shifted, hugging her knees to her chest. "Yeah...yeah. Hey...you mind if I eat lunch with you and the rest of PoPiPa tomorrow?"

"Sure, maybe Kasumi will make you cheer up, she's on that same wavelength as Tsurumaki-san," said Arisa with a slight smile.

"Thanks. I won't hog her from you too much."

"I know you--w-wait! What's that supposed to mean!?"

-  
Misaki made sure to get up early on Friday. She had asked Kokoro to stay up late if she could, and the other girl agreed eagerly.

_"what did you want to talk about? or did you wanna see more pics of the pretty cathedral i saw yesterday??"_

Misaki smiled at her girlfriend's enthusiasm. _"You can send pictures later. I just wanted to have some actual time to talk to you."_ She paused before sending a follow up message. _"I really miss you."_

_"omg i miss you too!! i love you so so so much misaki!"_  
_"it's only two more days and then i'll be home and we can hang out and cuddle and kiss and stuff!!!"_  
_"only if you want to tho! the cuddling and kissing and stuff part"_  
_"i wanna hang out as soon as i get back NO MATTER WHAT!"_

After the string of rapid texts, a picture came through of Kokoro with a beaming smile, the night sky of Milan sparkling behind her. Misaki hugged her phone for a moment before replying.

_"Yeah, I want to. Thanks for asking."_  
_"I'm gonna get ready for school. I'm glad you stayed up to talk with me."_

_"ofc ofc! i love you misaki <3 <3"_

Just from that conversation, Misaki felt her day was much better. She did indeed spend lunch with the members of Poppin'Party, which helped her feel less alone. The anxiety looming over here was mostly gone, though she did find herself still checking her phone whenever she could.

-  
The weekend came once again. Misaki spent her Saturday at Hagumi's softball game. Kanon and oddly also Chisato and Aya were there (Kanon later explained she'd gotten lost on the way to the game, ran into Aya and Chisato, and they all decided to hang out together), and when Hagumi's team won, all four bystanders found themselves swept up into the celebration lunch at a family restaurant.

It was the first real fun Misaki had all week. She even made sure to take a picture to show Kokoro.

Sunday was a little rougher, due to the anticipation of Kokoro's return. Misaki found herself wandering to Ryuseido, surprising Arisa. Her classmate chided her for showing up out of the blue without texting, but accepted Misaki's offer to hang out in town anyway.

That night, Misaki was curled up on her bed when her phone rang. She smiled upon seeing Kokoro's name on the screen and accepted the call.

"Hey."

"MISAKIIIII!!!! Okay, okay, I JUST got home but I'm walking outside right now and--oh you'll drive me? Thanks Miss suit person! Okay, I'm getting DRIVEN to your place just wait I'll be there really soon!" The call ended before Misaki could even respond. Which was probably for the best. She had felt herself tearing up at the sound of Kokoro's voice after not hearing it for so long.

Misaki decided to wait just outside her front door. It meant she could see Kokoro that much sooner. It was only a few more minutes before she saw the sleek black car pull up nearby, and a yellow blur jump out of it and run towards her. Misaki opened her arms in anticipation.

The force of Kokoro's tackle slammed them against the front door, but Misaki didn't care.

"Misakiiiiii!" Kokoro's excited squeal was muffled into Misaki's sweatshirt, along with her clearly holding back from screaming. "The suit person that drove me reminded me that it's really late so I shouldn't yell even though I want to so so badly."

"I appreciate it. I'm sure everyone else on the block does too." Misaki buried her hair in Kokoro's blonde locks, deeply inhaling the citrus and sunshine scent embedded within. "I'm...so glad you're all right."

"Huh? Of course I am!"

"I...was kinda worried. My head was being stupid and I thought you'd get hurt or you wouldn't come back..."

"Oh, I could kinda tell you were super anxious. 'Cause you were saying a lot of stuff you usually don't say in texts." Kokoro pulled back, and put her hands on Misaki's face. "But that's all in the past, and I'm back now, and I told my parents next time they make me take a fancy vacation you're coming with me no matter what. Because I need you!"

Misaki closed her eyes and smiled broadly. "Sounds great. Let's go inside before we wake the neighborhood. I snuck some cookies into my bedroom for us." Taking her girlfriend by the hand, Misaki opened the door. "And Kokoro?"

"Yeah, Misaki?"

"I need you, too. Thanks for putting up with me."

**Author's Note:**

> original prompt from ultimate misakoko champion feathers (nicofeathers on twitter). shoutouts to misaki discord and to everyone tiering HHW BS2


End file.
